Truth be told, I have been so overwhelmed by my mom-of-four-boys gig that my brain checked out and the police had to intervene. It sounds more scandalous than it was, but keep reading anyway.
It happened today when I was driving home from church with 3 kids; that sounds harmless doesn't it? (Husband and one son weren't with us, because they went out to brunch with Grandpa for Father's Day.) So, as I pulled out of the church parking lot, I noticed there was a police car going in the same direction. Not really noteworthy, but I did see him.
I was thinking as I was driving about what methods I was going to use to punish my kids for their terrible behavior at church. You see, I had volunteered to lead my 3 year old's class, with my 10 year old as a helper. And due to shortage of time and miscommunication, my 5 year old had ended up in the room with us as well. So it was me, three of my boys, and eight adorable 3 year olds who don't belong to me. This would be no problem if the 10 year old stepped up his game and entertained the kids. Not a problem if the 5 year old behaved himself and set a good example. And again, not a problem if the 3 year old behaved as well as he usually does, when he has a different teacher. But today...I was fresh out of luck and loaded with problems. My kids were not interested in helping out unless I was nagging. I told the bible story, we did the art project, it went just fine, but I felt like I was on my own and begging my kids not only to help out, but to behave. Suffice it to say, by the end of this morning, I was tired and crabby and I wanted to kill my kids. Of course I don't usually get what I want, so I had to come up with a more thoughtful punishment for them.
Their punishment was exactly what I was thinking about as I was careening down the road, right past a police car doing the speed limit. When I saw the lights flashing in my rear-view mirror, I actually thought, "Hey, isn't that the cop who was in front of me a minute ago? .... Wait, he's pulling me over?" Good God, Mrs. Oblivious. He informed me that he had flipped on his radar when I whizzed past him and clocked me going 60mph in a 50mph zone. You know what I was thinking when he strolled back to his squad car with my license in hand? I was thinking, "like hell if I am ever volunteering at church again". Not that it was the church's fault, obviously. I was overwhelmed by my own doing, and now my anger wasn't just at my kids, it was at myself. I was going to pay a huge fine and my insurance rates would go up. So many swear words were bouncing around inside my head I'm pretty sure there was an audible buzz.
So imagine my shock when the officer gave me a warning, and said I should "pay attention". Yep, snapped out of oblivion, thank you sir. I had plenty of time while waiting for my ticket to finish up the punishment plan for my kids. Now I planned to pay full attention to my speed for the remainder of the drive home. In case you are curious, the kids had to sit down at the table and write sentences about their behavior, and how they would change it next time. I'm pretty sure after a boy writes "I will behave at church" a hundred times, he'll remember it. We'll see.
As for me, I was thankful to have a reminder to pay attention, and not get that dreaded speeding ticket. It's hard not to get overwhelmed by this chaos, but preventing the shift into oblivion is definitely something I can work on.
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