Top 5 Things I Hate/Love About Summer

Up here in the North, we savor every bite of our precious morsel of summer. It’s not that I don’t love summer – because I do. It’s just that there are a few things I could do without.

Swimsuits. It is impossibly difficult for me to find a swimsuit that fits. If I'm lucky and search high and low all summer, I find that magical suit every few years. So I’m either stuck wearing a suit that is worn out, or I’m wearing a suit that doesn’t fit. There should be a custom swimsuit maker who comes over to my house and privately fashions a swimsuit to fit, flatter and cover every little imperfection perfectly. She would bring wine and chocolates, and look like a combination of Mary Poppins and Eva Longoria. She’d have never-ending fabric samples and magical sewing skills. And she’d do this with expertise and speed, out of the goodness of her heart, so the perfectly fitted swimsuit wouldn’t cost a fortune.

Shaving. I hate to admit this, but during our 6 months of winter, I rarely shave. If ever. So when summer finally makes a brief appearance, I often forget to shave, and then I do it in a hasty, nick of time rush. (Pun intended there.) I hate the rashy skin I get, and the inconvenience of shaving. I have this friend who actually had laser hair removal to resolve this ugly nonsense. She had it done on her legs, her pits, bikini – the whole shebang. I know - unbelievable and unfair. Believe me, I brush my stubbly unshaven legs against her every chance I get.

Popsicles. The kids love ‘em, but they are the bane of my summer. How is it that one tiny little popsicle can melt down a child’s arms and legs and pool into a blue puddle at their feet? And why is it that popsicles are made of food dye more permanent than markers? How is that a single popsicle can cause stickiness to spread on every door handle, faucet handle, chair, countertop and square foot of floor that a child touches? If I could proliferate money like popsicles proliferate stickiness, I’d never have to work again. As it is, I’m washing every surface, and scrubbing blue drips off my 3 year old. Again. (And I'm still looking for that illusive job, by the way.)

Sunblock. It’s greasy, it smells bad, and I have to slather it all over myself, my 4 moving targets, and my husband. This has to happen every two hours – which basically leaves no time for anything else. On a good day, the stuff doesn’t make my skin break out, but good days are few and far between.

Social Coordinator & Chauffeur. Summer is the fleeting time period when we cram all of our crazy vacations and family related travel into a few weeks. I drive my boys to practices, games, camps, the beach, friends’ houses, and to the store a zillion times a week. If our schedule isn’t full, they just fight, so we have to keep moving. But it's tiring to keep moving all summer, and there are days I wish to sit and read a whole book.

Weeding the Garden. Is it just me, or do weeds grow ten times faster than perennials? I had this grand plan for my garden to grow and crowd out the weeds, which would have worked perfectly if the weeds didn’t grow like mutant beanstalks. I’m so tired of pulling, whacking and spraying weeds that I give up on more and more of my “garden” every year. I scream obscenities at the deer eating my lilies, and praise the rabbits for munching in the right areas. It’s total lunacy.

Yeah, I just noticed that's 6 things I hate. Sure, I complain too much about what I'm supposed to be enjoying - but I do have a few loves of summer too.

Picnics and BBQs. Isn’t picnic food divine? Maybe I belong down South, but there is nothing better than a plate of BBQ ribs and sweet corn from the grill, potato salad, beans, watermelon, and pie. Throw in some hard lemonade and I am in heaven. Of course, the best part of picnicking with kids is the elimination of all clean-up duties, and just letting them get messy to their little hearts' content.

Bike Rides. We line up like the Sturgis bike rally and go as far as the kids can stand it. Surprisingly, biking is one activity my kids will enjoy without complaint. No video games, no snacks, we just ride. We often ride the entire two mile trek to Dairy Queen! Yes, we are hardcore.

The Lake. I didn’t grow up with the benefit of 10,000 lakes, and I have to say this is my favorite part of Minnesota. (Ahem, aside from the every so nice Scandinavians.) Going to the lake is a fun time for the whole family, whether we are building sand castles or fishing or boating.

Road Trips & Classic Rock Music. There’s something about listening to classic rock in the car, in the summer, with the windows down. Just yesterday I heard Fleetwood Mac followed by The Rolling Stones, and I had to drive past my house just to keep driving until the song was over. I wouldn't listen to that radio station in any other setting, but wow. Road trips for us are a max of 3 hours - with a video - but we're working on expanding our horizons. The kids are training now for an 11 hour trip in a few weeks. My training may involve Valium. Oh wait, I'm not complaining here, these are my "loves". Oops.

Baseball. Sure, it can be a hassle going to all those baseball games, but the truth is I’ve never loved baseball more than I do when I get to watch my kids play. I’m not one to attend more than one Major League game a year, but watching Junior Minor League? I’m all in. Give me sunflower seeds and a camp chair and I’m as happy as when I'm watching trashy TV and sipping a glass of wine. Okay, almost as happy.

I better get moving now - summer's almost over!